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03 November 2011 @ 10:38 am
Dissecting Pages for Mood  
I'm madly getting ready for my Long Island event tomorrow and my UK tour right after that, but I got an e-mail last night that made me want to do a quick blog post. It was a really lovely e-mail and also had a really good question in it, which is this:

"Although I am going to desperately try to stop this from sounding like a tedious English essay in the hopes that you don't get so bored that you stop reading half way through, I just have to say that I find your use of metaphorical language and your character development beautiful. It seems to flow so naturally through the books and as someone who finds writing the most entertaining and frustrating hobby, I am not ashamed to say I am more than marginally jealous.

If, by some strange miracle Maggie (or anyone affiliated to her/you for that matter) could answer my question as to whether this is just something that comes naturally or had to be worked on?"

First of all, if I could please convince anyone affiliated with me to go through my e-mails, they'd get answered a lot faster. I have over 1,400 legitimate non-spam e-mails sitting in my inbox right now. If I had a trusty manservant or homicidal robot or trained penguin or something . . .

I digress.

I really like this question because metaphor and character development is something I work at, a lot, and also because, for me, it is in fact the most important thing for me to work at. Other writers might have different priorities, but for me, the chief goal of my novels is not plot or premise or pacing, but to evoke a certain feeling. I will sacrifice most anything in order to change someone's mood in a certain way. I can't do that without careful navigation of metaphor and character development.

Here's the thing: when you're toying with people's emotions, they can't notice that you're doing it, or the effect is ruined. You have to be a sneaky puppet master, working in between the lines, never telling the reader how they are supposed to feel but nonetheless getting them there in the end. It's really hard for me to describe how I think about this, but maybe if I take apart two pages of The Scorpio Races, I can show you. And maybe you can ask questions in the comments if you have any? I'll be traveling but I'm trying to catch up.

Okay, so here are the pages just as they are, from the middle of the book, shortly after Puck (Kate) and Sean meet. If you click on it, it'll open in a bigger window.


untaken apart


Okay, and here is the marked up version. Yellow lines are everything I put in for character development. Blue lines are setting — in this case, Thomas Gratton is part of the setting, establishing the mood and the backdrop for this Sean/ Puck interaction. The red lines are mood and pacing sections that are not . . . I don't want to say strictly necessary, because obviously I think they are or they wouldn't be in there. They aren't necessary for a factual retelling of these events, how's that? Because when it comes down to it, this is what happens in these pages: Sean gets into the truck with Puck, the dog goes in the back, and Sean and Puck sit in awkward silence. There's all that happens in the plot. (That's also what the un-underlined lines accomplish in this scene.) But does that do anything towards toying with reader emotions? No! I say, double NO!

Again, click to make it larger.


taken apart


For me, writing is reverse engineering. It's why I listen to music while I'm writing; because I have to have the mood for the scene and the book set firmly in my head before I begin. Then it becomes a problem-solving session of finding out what, exactly, I have to do to make that mood happen. It's like those writing exercises where you have to describe someone as tall without ever saying the word "tall." Found knowledge is always more valuable than given knowledge; the reader needs to draw their own conclusions.

So remember, it's not that the parking lot is lonely. It's that it's empty, and there's one seagull picking at an abandoned bag of cold French Fries next to an old Escort with a dent in the door and a dirty, crumpled battle of the bands poster.

Wow, that sounds like a destination.

I . . . should pack.


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Current Music: "Caught a Long Wind" - Feist
 
 
( 33 comments — Leave a comment )
Stephanie Thompson Lawton[info]Stephanie Thompson Lawton on November 3rd, 2011 03:00 pm (UTC)
drafts
Does all of the above go in during your first draft, or do you "pad it out" and add layering during revisions? (Perhaps my question is a rebellious reaction to Nanowrimo.)
Maggie Stiefvater[info]m_stiefvater on November 3rd, 2011 03:37 pm (UTC)
Re: drafts
Oh, it happens during the first draft. Some gets added in later, of course, but I tend to write my first drafts quite meticulously. The things that I add in subsequent drafts are new scenes - or places where I alter this in between stuff to reflect new things I know about the characters now.
midnightblooms[info]midnightblooms on November 3rd, 2011 03:03 pm (UTC)
Reading this post, I just had a light bulb moment. Thank you!
Maggie Stiefvater[info]m_stiefvater on November 3rd, 2011 03:37 pm (UTC)
YES! I am happy to inspire any wattage.
kusanar[info]kusanar on November 3rd, 2011 03:20 pm (UTC)
It's all about padding out the novel in the show don't tell way :D Very interesting, thanks for posting this!

Have fun on your trip!!
Maggie Stiefvater[info]m_stiefvater on November 3rd, 2011 03:37 pm (UTC)
Yeah, exactly. It's a paper where your thesis is that these people are real, and you have to prove it.

And thanks!
Tina Allen Peacock[info]Tina Allen Peacock on November 3rd, 2011 04:02 pm (UTC)
You just unclogged my NaNoWriMo block!
What a wonderful way to re-frame what it is that I am plodding away at this month with NaNo! Love your wit and wisdom! Hope you have an inspired journey : )
Maggie Stiefvater[info]m_stiefvater on November 3rd, 2011 04:25 pm (UTC)
Re: You just unclogged my NaNoWriMo block!
That's brilliant! Good luck and thank you!
in other words: ms. group:)[info]earenwe on November 4th, 2011 12:49 am (UTC)
I think I need that quote pasted onto my computer. Thank you so much for sharing this post. It's just what I needed.
Amanda Fisher[info]Amanda Fisher on November 14th, 2011 03:12 am (UTC)
love this
Loving that quote, Maggie... I just wrote it down and stuck it to the wall behind my monitor. =)
bandana1[info]bandana1 on November 3rd, 2011 03:49 pm (UTC)
Scorpio Races was the fist book in months that didn't put me to sleep after a few pages. And this post explains why your books and writings are magic.
Maggie Stiefvater[info]m_stiefvater on November 3rd, 2011 04:25 pm (UTC)
*blush* Here's to many more books that don't inspire lsumber. Um, slumber.
Heather[info]edgyauthor on November 3rd, 2011 04:53 pm (UTC)
Fun! I love seeing writing analysis stuff like this. I also really love what you had to say about being a "puppet master." That's exactly what it feels like when I try to sneak in certain elements and emotions in my own writing....
Amanda Olivieri[info]xamandaolivieri on November 3rd, 2011 05:01 pm (UTC)
Thank you! This was extremely helpful. Your writing style is my absolute favorite. Also, see you on Long Island tomorrow! :)
Lauren James[info]Lauren James on November 3rd, 2011 05:30 pm (UTC)
Mood
I think it's so clear when an author is very intentional about the way they build characters and set a mood. Where you learn by watching, and each time you re-read the same scene you gather something more. Those are always the books that I want to keep on hand so that I can pick them up, flip to a passage in the middle of the story and enjoy it again, even if it’s just one page. I generally get my books from the library. However, The Scorpio Races is one of two books I read this year that I needed to buy so that I don’t forget the tiny scenes and how I felt reading them (Jellicoe Road is the other). Both times the writing blew me away. I love that the scene above seems so simple on first glance, but its subtlety makes it brilliant. I just wanted to say thanks for writing and for being intentional at it, because readers can tell the difference, and it’s a wonderful thing. Now if I could just figure out where exactly Thisby is located, because I'd sure like to visit...
[info]jclaine on November 3rd, 2011 05:30 pm (UTC)
creative genius vs. plain hard work
Thanks for this, Maggie. The Scorpio Races speaks to me in a way that I can't quite find words for. I've been re-reading it for days, trying to figure out why, but mostly I just keep getting sucked back into the story only to resurface an hour later wondering what question I was supposed to be answering.

Anyway...it's helpful to see your process dissected like this. But, the things that struck me about this post were 1) your example about the parking lot--which I am imagining flowing from your brain to the keyboard in far less time than it's taking me to ask this question--and 2) the comment about how most of this character/mood meat is present in your first draft. Has this changed/gotten easier since your earlier books? I can certainly understand how use of language matures and evolves for a writer over time, but what about the ideas, the raw creative material? How is your process of determining what to say different from your process of determining how to say it?
Chuck Sauce[info]steptotheleft on November 3rd, 2011 06:34 pm (UTC)
A friend of mine just pointed me in the direction of your LJ, and I'm quite excited! Your writing makes me jealous! Same friend just hurled copies of Lament and Ballad at me last week and threatened me with pain if I didn't read them. Needless to say I'm glad she did, and not just for my physical well-being. :D

I'm really glad I got to see this post-- tone/mood is hard! Thank you so much for sharing this.
☆★☆Natasha★☆★[info]yukinakid on November 3rd, 2011 07:01 pm (UTC)
I am sure this is probably the most repeated, generic question you ever get asked, but I quickly realized that I am a perfectionist. Which means that I cannot make myself start in order to hone my writing. Which means I shoot down ideas until none are left breathing and the ones that are I quickly shoot again.

As far as descriptive writing goes, mood and feel, how would you approach my very stubborn stupidly perfectionist mind and whip it into practicing? I think I know what to do, but hearing it from another mouth usually helps my mind decide that maybe I am not trying to lead it astray. My plan is to take a couple of things I see during the day and write about them, describing them in every word but the one that is the most obvious.

Now this is easier said than done, because my mind is in the overdrive of "Natasha, if you do not do (insert a physics or organic assignment) you will fail and then you will default on your loans, not get accepted to graduate school, live under a bridge and die alone." This mentality is what keeps me studying and determined when all my other classmates have perished or simply turned their backs on their dreams, but severely cuts off blood flow to my creativity.

Your words will (hopefully) be a reminder to me, from a friend (and fellow Malachi lover) that my life does not begin and end with college. I want to write. I want to write every day, every hour, I just push that to the side because I literally study/do assignments/dance like a porcupine on fire every hour of every day. What little time I do have my brain stops (or I read a book, because having ready-made creativity seems so much easier sometimes).

That being said, I will email you with a lovely review/thoughts on the Scorpio Races for your archive as soon as I can convince my brain that there is not a bomb strapped to my chest and that enjoyment is not a crime.

P.S. I have made two new converts to Maggie-ism via Shiver/Linger/Forever. Just thought you should be aware of a couple more drops of crazy into your bucket.

P.P.S. Malachi is a lovely teenage rabbit now, with all the glorious mood swings but also such a beautiful colored coat and quirky personality. He maintains his love of coconut.
Megan Shepherd[info]Megan Shepherd on November 3rd, 2011 09:30 pm (UTC)
Thanks for a very helpful post
All day today I was having one of those off days with writing, where what I wanted to accomplish in my head just wasn't translating to the page, and then I stumbled upon this and it helped so much. I especially like the line "Found knowledge is always more valuable than given knowledge." I couldn't agree more. THANK YOU for sharing, Maggie!
JP: Myoga-ListenToYourElders-InuYasha[info]jpmarsull on November 3rd, 2011 11:35 pm (UTC)
OH MY GOD. THIS IS SO HELPFUL. I think I may be TREMBLING with the HELPFULNESS of this. THANK YOU. *crushes Maggie with hug*
Tez Miller[info]tezmilleroz on November 4th, 2011 02:43 am (UTC)
If there's a Gratton character, is there also a Yovanoff? ;-)

P.S. Amazon UK is showing your redesigned covers for the SHIVER trilogy, so it's probably safe to go public with them ;-)
[info]anitasaxena on November 4th, 2011 03:08 am (UTC)
Wow. Thanks.
I really enjoyed reading this post. I'm working on a revision right now and one of my main goals was mood and setting. This post was a great way for me to see your reverse engineering in action. Best of luck packing and have a great trip!
[info]Jennifer Kos on November 4th, 2011 04:01 am (UTC)
This is so interesting. I don't think pulled this info out had I been trying to dissect this on my own. What really stands out for me is the study in contrasts between Sean Kendrick and Gratton. While Puck sort of glosses over Gratton (I mean, she doesn't even use his first name in this section), she seems to notice everything about Sean. It also seems as if there's a lot more metaphor and speculation when it comes to Sean while the description of Gratton is more grounded. It makes it seem as if Puck's annoyance is sort of a superficial cover for her awe of Sean.
Chaotic Prose: Random ~ Monkey Knife Fight[info]chaoticprose on November 4th, 2011 05:45 am (UTC)
A) This is awesome, Maggie! Thank you! I can't tell you how much I learn from your posts like these.

B) No lie--I just got The Scorpio Races a few days ago, and when I saw the page in your post I thought I'd have to skip it to avoid spoilers. Then I read the description and realized that, not only was I ok, but that is the VERY page I left off on. Seriously. I'm pretty sure Rod Serling is standing in my living room somewhere.
yozakura: Yozakura[info]yozakura1985 on November 4th, 2011 09:13 am (UTC)
Just got the Scorpio Races as e-book (after finishing Forever - awesome - I needed to have it AT ONCE!!) and also by reading your journal I again recognized, how much I love your writing!
You're there with your whole heart - and a puppet master!
Perfect combination! :D
Have a good journey and I hope, you'll come to Germany in near future again! Or to Japan (I'll move there next year)? I can translate your books! *laugh*
[info]marie_miller on November 4th, 2011 07:29 pm (UTC)
This post could not have come at a more appropriate time. I have been in a funk lately when it comes to writing. Nothing has been coming out the way I want it to. I began reading some of my favorite YA novels - including yours - and tried to pay attention to things I liked about the writing.
This element - mood - kept creeping up, but while I could see the difference between scenes I liked and scenes I wrote and didn't like, I couldn't figure out how to cross from one side to the other.
The post helps infinitely. Thank you!
jazza104[info]jazza104 on November 4th, 2011 08:54 pm (UTC)
I am not a writer nor do I have any false impressions that I am good at writing, but as someone who finds creative writing an enjoyable pastime, this is possibly one of my favourites of your "writing" posts.

Oh, and I have a question. Not all that relevant but, hey:
Is Gratton named after Tessa, or simply a name that you knew because of Tessa, but used because it fit the character? Or both?
[info]Bea Barnsworth on November 6th, 2011 04:48 am (UTC)
Amazing. Mood is the kind of thing I prioritize as well. When I'm thinking about the shape of a story, I'm thinking mostly about character and how I want the reader to feel when they finish. Plot is very tertiary for me, perhaps because it's also one of my weaknesses. Sometimes I find that my best writing comes after an hour of staring at a blank Word document and listening to the same song on repeat, and then writing by instinct. I also find mood is easier to establish/sustain with shorter stories. With novels, I lose momentum in the in-between bits that transition a story from scene to scene, but I think this is because I'm still not adept at making every part purposeful. I'm currently participating in NaNoWriMo (and I am aware of your stance on that), because it gets me to put a story on paper from start to finish. But it's true--I often find the evocative descriptions are sacrificed in favor of "quick" descriptors (like "tall") that allow me to move on. Anyway, thanks for this post--I really enjoyed the passage that you posted. It's really helpful for thinking about my own writing.

-Taure
josh.c.martin[info]nadrik on November 7th, 2011 02:18 pm (UTC)
P.S. to the e-mail subtitled "Hooves"
I tried Mr Malvern's tea... just for kicks.
...

Puck was right. It's gross.
josh.c.martin[info]nadrik on November 9th, 2011 10:29 pm (UTC)
Re: P.S. to the e-mail subtitled "Hooves"
P.P.S. Also, I think you were right in thinking that some part of you has been left in the cliffs of England, because the voices (and the contrast between Sean and George Holly) left me utterly convinced Thisby was some sort of British settlement. Yes?
seibslikefeebs[info]seibslikefeebs on November 12th, 2011 04:37 pm (UTC)
I completely agree that "Found knowledge is always more valuable than given knowledge; the reader needs to draw their own conclusions." This is so true in so many areas of life. Well said Maggie.

scampii091: artnut[info]scampii091 on November 14th, 2011 12:37 am (UTC)
It was brilliant to meet you in Liverpool on Saturday Maggie. Thank you for an inspiring evening - I hope you get lots of rest after your chilly stint in the UK, and may all the tea you drink be sweet.
otterkat.wordpress.com[info]otterkat.wordpress.com on November 18th, 2011 08:23 am (UTC)
Scorpio Races & Happy Birthday !!!
I received my gorgeous copy of TSR from Fountain this week [complete with fabulous capall doodle!], and I don't have the words to say how moved by it I was. I laughed and bawled, became completely engrossed in the lives of Puck and Sean [LOVE the "We're in training" line!], Corr, Thisby and its people. Astounding, beautiful, gloriously gory, thrilling, amazing mythology . . . Just, thank you for this book. Best ever.

Also; Happy happy birthday Maggie! Bestest wishes. When / where / how are you celebrating?

x Jules

PS How did you find Belfast? Hope you had a pint in one of the snugs in the Crown!
( 33 comments — Leave a comment )